I AM YOU.

I UNDERSTAND.

I am eternally grateful that you have become a part of "Deborah's Freedom". Some have been present on this journey since the beginning and some have just taken the plunge on my quest to educate, motivate and encourage.  We are a weary generation and the news does nothing but fuel our senses with more negative stuff to process IN ADDITION to our own personal plights.  When you visit "Deborah's Freedom" - just know - it is YOUR freedom too.  

I could not go to bed tonight without re-introducing myself. I intimately acquainted with many of the struggles you may be facing. Understanding your struggle does not make me an expert and in fact, I felt great shame in admitting some of my past. Thing is, I survived. I personally know people who have lost their minds, committed suicide or worst some have died at the hands of their abuser after going through what I went through and for this I am humbled that God saw it wise to salvage my broken heart because I NOW know it is to help heal yours.

I KNOW domestic abuse. I KNOW about the visible scars. I KNOW about PTSD as a result of domestic abuse - or some call it mental abuse. I KNOW what it is like to be "sleeping with the enemy". I KNOW what it like to be a single mom and raise a functional child fit to be a contributor to society. I KNOW the "baby daddy" drama and the need for help and no way to get it from the legal system. I KNOW what it is like to be flat busted broke yet go to work every day. because day care was eating up my finances. I KNOW about crying in the middle of the night until morning just to get up out of the bed and struggle to put my mascara on because I was in tears AND had to go to a job that did not honor my integrity BUT was required to work BECAUSE I HAD TO. i KNOW what it feels like to wander everyday wondering "when is all of this foolishness in my life gonna change". I KNOW what it feels like when people say they "wanna be like me" and not know the courage it took to just smile. I KNOW what it feels like to have creativity locked up inside of me and no where to go with it (or so I thought). I KNOW what it feels like to want to give up. I KNOW what it feels like to desire a mate but refuse to deal with the drama so you learn to "just say NO" as I wait on God. I KNOW what it feels like to hear ministers spit out scriptures like a rapid fire machine gun from the pulpit, go home and look up the same scriptures in the bible and STILL feel like nothing is working in my own life.

I KNOW so much more - in between these lines but best of all ....I KNOW .... YOU. I went through so much to tell you that I KNOW of a God who is able to do exceedingly, abundantly, above all I could ask or think BUT it is all according to the power that works within you.  Where do you get this "power" by having a RELATIONSHIP with the Father.  It is nothing we can escape, the world needs God.  What I am NOT is a seasoned theologian with years of seminary school under my belt - but what I AM is a woman of wisdom - the wisdom gained through pain - and eventual triumph.  YOU DO NOT have to endure SOME things in life when you KNOW someone who has already been on the same journey you are on.  Your past is not the label you should answer to.  The abuse, the molestation, the incest, the emotional devastation - call it what you may - it HAPPENED but it should not define who you are or where you are going.  Just imagine who you would be IF that one thing did not happen.  Imagine what you would be doing if you had not met HIM or HER.  Imagination time is over.  Let's get to the business of becoming whole again - you may be waiting on God - truth is, God is waiting on YOU.

Be gone with ALL MEN are dogs.  Begone with all women are "GOLD DIGGERS".  Not so.  While one monkey can't stop the show - and one bad apple can spoil the whole bunch - did you know that YOU ARE A MASTERPIECE?  God chose the color of your eyes and every hair on your head is numbered!!!  When you look at your comb or brush and see hair in it - imagine God knowing that hair number 1,000,255 just came out!  Is that amazing or what.  Let's change the conversation from negative to positive and let's start with the conversation we have with ourselves.  Your inner voice is speaking and we can work together at changing what we say to ourselves.  You are worth so much more than you give yourself credit for!!

I send (publish) posts to you that minister to ME first - 'cause I know the audience I am speaking to. I KNOW how to fake it .... but now I know the authentic me. I am sent by God to be your life-line. No strings attached. I want to speak to your heart. Through God's help, I want to extend to you hope. I had NO one to help me to I wandered around until I got real with myself. I did not go through what I went through for no reason - it all happened TO ME - but it was FOR YOU!!

I have compassion for YOU.

I UNDERSTAND YOU

I am YOU.