Saying Good-Bye wo 2019 ...

Bittersweet emotions swell within my heart as I seek to compose words to end "THE YEAR THAT WAS"!  While there were memorable moments that made me SMILE - this was undoubtedly an uncommonly painful year!!  The losses of people who meant a lot to me to the loss of people I had "assumed" would be friends forever.  Certainly God has a "Master Plan" - but in this mortal space of humanity, sometimes LIFE just hurts.

I am not a "huge" fan of "new years resolutions" BUT this year I am "speaking to 2020"!  I live a very "structured" life and I lack the ability to be spontaneous.  The life I have been dealt requires me to manage a home, raise a child and the elements of these two tasks alone are daunting.  I have NO regrets.

Saying "Good-Bye to 2019" is much more than turning the calendar because we are entering a new DECADE!!  The overwhelming sense of reality that we are entering a new DECADE is HUGE to me.

Yeah, I still want to "lose weight" and "budget more" - but the picture I paint on the inside when I consider that this is a new DECADE is bigger than ever!  Many of my aspirations will remain SILENT until such time as God reveals them openly but my expectations are HIGH!!

In January, if someone would have told me I would see December - there were times I would have questioned them.  A journey of a million miles DOES begin with the first step!  I can undeniably testify about the reward of ENDURANCE!  Looking back over the past 12 months - I can honestly say - "had it not been for the Lord on my side - where would I be".  Yes, weariness DID set in.  The battle for SURVIVAL was exhausting.  Did I want to "give up"?  ... Heck, YES!  I had "HOPE" to hold on to and that was "IT" sometimes.   I wish I could recount things differently - but the truth is - 2019 was a year of many tears.

There WERE a few unexpected moments that I'd relegate to be "SUDDENLY" or "SURPRISE MOMENTS" for sure.  Just a few weeks ago I ("Deborah's Freedom") became registered with the State of South Carolina as a Non-Non Profit Organization.  Yep, Deborah's Freedom" is now LEGALLY CLASSIFIED as "Deborah's Freedom", INCORPORATED!!  Through an unexpected chain of events - GOD DID IT!!  While I am wrapping my mind and emotions around the work ahead - I am grateful for the possibilities this brings for "Deborah's Freedom" to help people on a level beyond the mental and spiritual - we will also be able to feed people in the natural - on a financial level.

I certainly did not expect to be SINGLE - AGAIN - through this holiday season - but, oh, well - I WAS!  Being single is not so painful anymore because I can see where I am maturing and growing on the inside.  I put a post on my page recently that said "I think it is a compliment when people tell me that my SOUL is beautiful".  Beauty IS only skin deep but a good soul - there is nothing like it!

 I am looking forward to 2020 - not just because 2919 was such a difficult year.  My anticipation is high because it is a "NEW BEGINNING"!

I am glad we made it.  I feel like I ma "crawling" my way into the new year - but at least I did not give up!  Thank You Jesus for carrying me!

Those of you that know me - know me well because I don't let people get too close to me.  Those that do not know me well - just remember my name -  "Deborah" is going somewhere - "Deborah's Freedom" will be a household name!  "Deborah's Freedom" will be the band-wagon that MANY - MANY people will want to get on!  WELCOME ABOARD!!

2020 is gonna be EPIC!!